Thoughts on January, the New Year, and the things we often put ourselves through.
By Louise Halling, a counsellor, wife and mum living with a disability – a type of muscular dystrophy.
To anyone who has started an unrealistic diet during the darkest, most depressing month of the year, could you just…NOT?
I mean.
Could you just… stop? It’s already 5th Jan, come on, you’ve done enough. Could you put the scales away and stop torturing your beautiful soul? Seriously? Has it ever worked before? Even for those in the southern hemisphere summer, there’s joy to be had there, so that’s no reason either.
Could you try something different this time?? Instead of all-or-nothing-thinking, could you just be excessively kind to yourself? Maybe increase the amount of wholesome, healthy foods to nourish your body (soup, veg, fruit, whole meal bread) lovely, healthy, warming things (or BBQ chicken if you’re in summer right now) but also… ALSO… occasional brownies?
Coz.
It’s January.
And it’s been hard.
And you KNOW…
You just KNOW.
Am not saying “keep stuffing your precious body full of sugar and wine and other shit”. No, don’t do that. That’s not kind. But also, don’t starve yourself, berate yourself, limit yourself, exclude all carbs (it’s winter here for goodness sake!!!) or re-enter cycles of misery and failure. Just.
Don’t.
PLEASE.
If you are middle aged like me – or older – then what might it mean to befriend the wobbly bits? To finally accept that you are NOT 22!!!!! The drooping neck line, the chunky thighs. The bloated middle, the fat upper arms. I mean, come on. Those chunky arms are kind of cute in a comical sort of way, don’t you think? Even on the body of your partner or your friend. Please can we just stop judging ourselves and others by our BODIES. It’s sooo tiring and pointless and such a waste of headspace!!!
I’ve had some level of disability now for more than half my life. My muscles have been wasting all this time and I am a good couple of stone heavier than I was in my 20s. Well no bloody wonder! I’m 44!! Newsflash: our bodies CHANGE! I’m fully perimenopausal, have been on numerous meds for many years, my body has birthed a child ( a CHILD!) and she works insanely hard to get me through each day. She can’t do any meaningful exercise but heck…..she’s amazing. My body is amazing! Just incredible! Soooo imperfect, so flabby and wobbly, wonky and wasted. But AMAZING!
If you can enjoy exercise, fresh air, sports, that is wonderful!!! What a gift! GO FOR IT but …. don’t make it agonising misery! No! Just NO! Embrace it for the celebration that it is, moving your body and thus raising your spirit as a result. Fantastic!
But please, please, please don’t torture yourself. Be excessively gentle to your body and mind… Dig deep and let loose.
And when you need it, just eat the dam brownie…
